As a little girl, I always envisioned what my wedding and marriage would be like. I didn’t fantasize about a big dress or a grand event as much as I dreamed about how it would feel. I knew it would be happy. Romantic. Loving. Safe & Forever.
What I didn’t envision were the detours.
I went through rocky relationships. I experienced emotional abuse, verbal abuse, and yes, even physical abuse. I was intimate before marriage. I was cheated on. I tolerated things I should have walked away from. And if I’m honest, all of it revealed one painful truth:
I did not truly love myself.
“You cannot require what you don’t believe you deserve”.
And I had to learn that the hard way. Scripture says in 1 John 4:19, “We love Him because He first loved us.” I couldn’t love a man correctly because I had not first fully received God’s love for me. I had been searching for affirmation in relationships when what I really needed was revelation from God.
When I surrendered my heart completely to Him, everything changed. God began to show me myself through His eyes. He showed me I was chosen. He showed me I was valuable. He showed me I was worthy of protection, not pain. Psalm 139:14 says, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” I had read that scripture before, but one day it became real to me.
That’s when I fell in love, with God first, and then with who He created me to be.
I became all God’s.
And when you become all God’s, you stop settling for anything less than what He ordains.
I told God specifically what I wanted in a husband. I wrote it down. Not from a place of control, but from a place of faith. The Bible says in Habakkuk 2:2, “Write the vision and make it plain.” I wrote the vision, but while I was writing, God was preparing me.
He began teaching me what it truly meant to be a wife. Not a girlfriend. Not someone playing house. A wife. A godly wife.
He taught me that love isn’t just butterflies and chemistry. According to 1 Corinthians 13, love is patient. Love is kind. Love is long-suffering. It keeps no record of wrong. It believes the best. It endures all things. That kind of love is not emotional; it’s intentional. It’s a covenant.
Then, on January 17, 1999, I met my husband.
Three weeks later, on February 12, 1999, he proposed.
And by April 21, 1999, we were married.
Some people would say that was fast. But when something is ordained, there is clarity. There is peace. There is alignment. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” That third strand, God, has been the difference.
A promised marriage is not perfect in the eyes of man. We have disagreements. We have growth seasons. We have moments that require stretching. But it is perfect in God’s eyes because He is in the middle of it.
A promised marriage is ordained by God.
Blessed by God.
Covered by God.
Protected by God.
It stands the test of time because it was built on something eternal.
You are both imperfect. But you are perfect for each other according to God’s design. Marriage is not about finding a flawless person. It’s about committing to love God’s way. And loving God’s way requires obedience.
It requires sacrifice.
It requires grace.
It requires forgiveness, daily.
Scripture in Ephesians 5 teaches us about the roles of husband and wife, not for control, but for order. When you do marriage God’s way, you experience God’s covering.
It’s not always easy. But anything worth having requires effort. To have God’s best, you must first strive to be God’s best.
You can’t pray for a godly spouse while refusing to become a godly partner.
You can’t ask God for a covenant while living casually.
A promised marriage is not about perfection. It’s about alignment. It’s about two people choosing every single day to honor God, honor each other, and protect what Heaven joined together.
If you are single, let God heal you before He joins you.
If you are waiting, let Him prepare you.
If you are married, guard what you prayed for.
Because when God authors your love story, He sustains it. And when He joins two people together, it is not fragile; it is fortified.
A promised marriage isn’t luck. It isn’t a coincidence. It isn’t just chemistry.
It is a covenant. It is ultimately God’s perfect plan for your life.
And when a covenant is sealed by God, covered by obedience, and sustained by love that reflects Christ, it doesn’t just survive. It stands!
Do it God’s way. Love God’s way. Marry God’s way. And you will experience “The Promised Marriage.”
© Promise Land International Ministries 2026
